My Christmas
by Lancette M. Kirkpatrick
Summary: *continuation of Micky D's* Snape lives through some memories. Tough memories. And finally confronts them this X-mas


~~~ JK Rowling owns these characters. Except for the mother and children ~~~

Note: A continuation from Micky D's

Severus Snape was sitting at his desk. He was still trying to get over Albus sending him into the muggle world last week just for some fries. He couldn't believe it. But it was now a week before Christmas. Most kids have left the halls to go home. He was happy. There was much less of kids to watch over. Much better, less to even see.

He was sick of the students. Most have been handing in their homework late, and not paying attention in class. He felt like ringing Potter's neck and his friends'. He hated him so much. How he wished just to kick him out of class forever. He knew he would be seeing him durring the week because he had no family to go to. He only felt slightly bad about that. He knew what it was like to celebrate Christmas alone.

Severus Snape did look like a very lonely man, but was loyal to many. He was very strict to the kids and forced the kids to learn. He strived for them to learn to protect them selves in the future. To the students he was known as the Potions Proffesor or the git, as he over heard many of them say. Students feared him, and tried not to cross his bath in fear of detention or loosing house points.

Severus knew he wasn't well liked among the students. He thought teaching would help clear up his past and acctually do good to the future wizards and witches. Being into the Dark Arts, he favored his house, the Slytherins. They made him proud. Most of the time. Most of them were on vacation except for a few. He didn't have to watch over many this year. 

Looking foward to this Christamas, he wanted to be alone. Away from the studnets and paper work. Away from the other batty teachers. Away from teaching for just one vacation. Away from the castle he felt bound too. 

Severus snapped back to reality. He found himself back in his office surrounded by paperwork. The fire near him seemed to be dying down. He rested his head in one hand and gazed into the fire. His mind drifted once more, but into a sleep mode.

***

Snape opened his eyes, once more, and found himself surrounded by snow. Getting up he brushed off his black robes and took a look around. Moving his greasy hair out of his face he found he wasn't at Hogwarts. The only thing he saw was a small cabin. He decided to talk to who ever was there and ask where he was.

As he reached closer, he heard a short shrill scream of a lady's voice. The door swung open before him. Three little children came running out in fear. They kept running till they got to the shed in the field. Severus thought they looked familier, but shook that thought out of his head. He need to borrow and owl or some sort of flying animal. 

He rapped on the door. Another shreech echoed out of the house. He knew that yell but couldn't put a finger on it. He entered the house trying not to make a sound. A half eaten meal was left in the kitchen in which he walked into. A single candle was lit. Five places were set on the table. Also a small cot was set in the far corner near the ice box. He noticed something on the stove was burning. He walked over and placed it off to the side. It was a beef stew. It smelled so delicious. It was just like his mothers. Picking up a spoon he was just about to taste it, when a little boy no older than 10 came running into the room. He was also followed by another scream from, what seemed like, two rooms away.

The little boy searched around the room. Trembling and breathing heavy he placed a book that was clinging to chest under a trash can. Slick black hair covered his face. Severus could tell the boy was malnurished from his skinny frame. The clothes were probably owned by one of the older sibblings. Severus didn't know what to say or do with The child standing three feet away from him.

Heavy foot steps were heard coming closer. The boy stood perfectly still. Try to erase the fear from his face. Snape looked down at the child then towards the foot steps. The boy didn't even seem to notice the man next to him.

"I must be dreaming," Snape said to himself.

"SEVERUS ALKIN SNAPE!" piercing words came into the room followed by a women with a wand in hand. "Get over here!" She said harshly. The woman stepped out of the door way into the light.

"Mother?" Fear filled Snape. Now he knew why the boy was scared. He knew who the boy was. Himself.

"Severus, get over here! If you listen it wont be any worse." Her knuckles were white around her wand.

"No, mother," Severus answered.

"What did you say, boy?"

"I can't."

"Oh yes you can. You are going to get it worse this time!" Hair that was usually tied back was now falling down in strands. The mother had a small build like the boy. An apron was always around her waist and a robe that was underneath it was tattered and ripped. His mother usually looked like this by the time dinner came. But when it was Christmas it was always worse. She strived to get everything right for herself. 

She didn't want the kids. Never did now that her husband was gone. He walked out. Severus lost his best friend, his father. He protected Severus against his mother and sibblings. No one else ever did. But now he was by himself. Had to protect himself. With his father gone, his mother beat him, sibblings picking on him and using magic on him. His brothers and sister were already in Hogwarts but couldn't stick up for themselves. They had the power, Severus didn't. They ran at the shrill cry of the mother's voice.

"Severus, Where is the book?"

"I don't know."

"Give me your father's book!"

"NO!" Severus cowerd at his own voice. He knew something was going to happen. Something bad.

Snape sat back in horror of looking at his mother and himself. He never knew how scared he looked to his mother. Tears were flowing down his child-self. He, himself, was choking back tears. He always put away memories of his Christmas's. He never wanted to feel like that again.

"Severus! Show me where the book is," She raised her wand at Severus's head. 

Snape watched in horror. He knew what was going to happen next. The punishment that sent him over the edge. The simple spell. The spell she used all of them but more force with him. Severus backed into the cabinet. The wand was now touching his forhead. Being shoved into his head. His mother's hands gripped the wand hard. It looked like it would splinter into a million peices any minute.

"I will kill you boy. I will. No one is here to save you. Not any more. Taking that book was the last thing you will ever do." Her lips sneered. Eyes burning into his she stated, "You will never forget this one."

Snape couldn't take it anymore. He knew he couldnt' stop a memory. Or even change it. Crumpling to the floor of the kitchen he went weak. The memories and emotions taking over his body was to much to handle. Still choking back tears he looked over at the child and mother. The horrid scene froze in time. His mother holding a piece of wood to his forhead and yelling. He turned back and placed his head in his hands. He couldn't take it. Kids, his mother, family, and Christmas. A single tear rolled down his cheak. He wanted nothing more for this to end. 

His mother's screams and his child-self weaping blurred to one. By now his mother's spell hit his head and he was unconscious. He heard a horrifing kick to a lifeless body. His mother did hate him. He heard footsteps come toward him them disseaper. Everything around him dissapeared to darkness.

***

Snape woke up in his office. The fire was half dead. The arm he was laying on was slightly moist. He figured it was his own tears. He sat straight up and looked back into the fire. And then back down at his papers. A light knock came from his office door.

"Enter," He half mumbled.

"Severus," A bearded figure entered the room. "I hope you will be joining us for the Christmas feast in five minutes."

Severus looked into the fire and back up at Dumbledore. "Yes, Yes I will be joining the staff tonight." He stood up, "I will be down in a minute."

"I will see you there then." Dumbledore left the room.

Severus waked to his closet and put on his cape. He took out his wand and extinguished the fire. He eyed his wand before putting it back in his pocket. He will never forget the screams from his memories.


End file.
